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[09 Mar 2004|10:10pm] |
i was a much better human being when i had this journal. i kind of wish it were two years ago right now; when mary was still my best friend and all that really upset me was the fact that i didn't have a love life. school was great, i had no real worries, no job, and was pretty much happy. i didn't realize it then; but i realize it now, and that's why memory sucks. i think if memory removal procedures really did exist, like in that new spike jonze movie, i would remove ever emotional memory i have. it sounds fucking retarded, but i think that'd be for the best. as liz put it; im in my own little world, and i'm kind of seperate from everybody else.
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[28 Jun 2003|01:05pm] |
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*BANG BANG BANG BANG*
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[17 Jun 2003|10:03pm] |
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Lauryn Hill - Everthing Is Everything |
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God damn it.
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I want to burn this lauryn hill cd but I only have 74 minute CDs and this CD is like 75 minutes or something.
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I'm arguing in forums again.
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*edit* But I downloaded four episodes of Salute Your Shorts to watch!
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[16 Jun 2003|10:32pm] |
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Xiu Xiu - Asleep |
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[16 Jun 2003|12:40pm] |
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go read this. RJ linked it in his lj and I thought it was interesting. He linked it from another community. Just go read it.
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[09 Jun 2003|03:50pm] |
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bigredmoment - blue serenity. |
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Last Twenty Movies Watched
5/31/03 - Carrie 2002
6/01/03 - Bad Taste
6/02/03 - Jubilee
6/04/03 - Island of Death
6/04/03 - Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare
6/04/03 - Meet the Feebles
6/05/03 - The Grandmother
6/05/03 - Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story
6/05/03 - Tombs of the Blind Dead
6/05/03 - Return of the Blind Dead
6/06/03 - Guinea Pig: Flower of Flesh and Blood
6/06/03 - Demons
6/06/03 - Wrong Turn
6/06/03 - Quiet Days in Clichy
6/07/03 - Beyond the Darkness
6/07/03 - Last House on Dead End Street
6/07/03 - Guinea Pig: Devil's Experiment
6/08/03 - Tromeo and Juliet
6/08/03 - Unit 731: Laboratory of the Devil (Man Behind the Sun 2)
6/09/03 - Guinea Pig: Android of Notre Dame
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[07 Jun 2003|12:31pm] |
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Zeigenbok Kopf - Nite Vision |
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go here and watch the commercials. you won't regret it.
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[05 Jun 2003|11:06pm] |
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i'm a nightclub singer on a seedy dark stage in a small town but the words i'm singing aren't mine, they're bits and pieces taken from others molded into one to form the effect i'm trying to make. it's just layers upon layers upon layers of all that i feel (but it's not my feelings it's it's it's ___) and then when the few people in the crowd clap I look up under my dark veil, MY DARK VOLUPTOUS VEIL, and blow cigarette smoke out of my mouth watching it float upwards. I hike up my skirt expecting a response, a hoot and a hollar, a cat call, anything to make me go farther farther farther farther until the skirts all the way up over my head and my legs are spread and i'm being force fed a large piece and by then i'm too tired to scream, too tired to care and stop pause think think think think think (!) i could just roll over and slap punch kick but i don't want to hard harder hardest but he stops i stop the tape stops it's a cut cut cut (when I cut the blood doesn't drip too long because i'm too quick to lap it up with my dry tongue) but the best comes in post production. such a shock when I see that i'm not the star i'm not the diva i'm not the femme fatale i'm not even in the credits i'm an extra extra seedy little extra but i'm still in that night club singing the words that aren't mine in the dark with the men drinking and the smoke blowing and sun falling.
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[01 Jun 2003|04:51pm] |
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I just got back from buying some videos to find my mother freaking out about some book I had. To further inquiry I revealed she had seen my copy of Anais Nin's "House of Incest" lying on my floor and had paged through "that awful book" and read "dirty passages." Owing to the fact that the book has nothing remotly to do with incest in the common used terminology, I had no idea what she was talking about, since there's nothing remotely offensive in the book. She made me show the book to my dad, who after browsing though the book and reading various passages deduced it as "just one of those weird books Michael reads." Thank God he was logical for once. My mother was passing it off as pornography without knowing remotely anything about it. Then after I get the book back my mother tells me that "[she] was just worried because one time a few years ago I heard you talking about that word on the phone." I replied, "Incest? When?" She said she had been listening to a conversation because "she had wanted to make sure I had gotten the phone" and heard me say "that word" and even my friend said that was gross. Of course I have no idea what she was talking about and since she said it was on the phone with this certain person it can most certainly be due to some lame joke I told a friend on the phone in junior high. Yeah, you're welcome for renting you a movie mom.
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[31 May 2003|11:38am] |
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Xiu Xiu - Asleep |
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Last Ten Movies I Watched
5/27/03 - Aguirre: the Wrath of God
5/27/03 - House on the Edge of the Park
5/28/03 - Hellraiser: Inferno
5/28/03 - Sleepaway Camp
5/29/03 - Hellraiser: Hellseeker
5/29/03 - Straw Dogs
5/29/03 - Halloween II
5/30/03 - Mondo Cane
5/30/03 - Angels and Insects
5/31/03 - Begotten
After Chris's party last night (which was very enjoyable) I went home because it was raining pretty hard and I figured that the show at the skate park would be cancelled. Once there I watched another hour or so of Angels and Insects, then calling Brad. We went to Denny's, and somehow for a milkshake and an order of cheesesticks I ended up paying ten dollars. Katy and Jess met us there, and I acted like a prick to Jess. I went home, finished Angels and Insects, and then I fell asleep watching Begotten (suprisingly no wierd dreams followed). I woke up this morning and finished it, and I know I used to hate this movie (I couldn't make it past the first twenty minutes previously) I think I really like it now. It really is like watching a car wreck, you just can't tear your eyes away. The soundtrack is probably what kept me entranced, it's almost like a mild Merzbow song with insect noises mixed in. I still have no idea what most of the symbolism meant, but it was enjoyable none the less.
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kurosade's journal